If you’ve met a few editors in your life, you may know we don’t love the spotlight. Few of us seek credit when we help another artist develop a project. Most of us are very happy to remain vocal but invisible in most facets of life. You may notice that on this website (designed by the incomparable Sarah Kleist) I am anything but invisible. That wasn’t always the case.
When I shifted to self-employment, I knew I’d be gaining freedom from a lot of things: the 9–5, the prescribed work, the company politics. And I knew that in exchange, I’d be taking on the added challenge of becoming my own editorial, finance, legal, and, most frighteningly, marketing department. The latter has been a Hurdle — and the driving reason for my now more visible online presence.
Before I started sharing about my business, my Instagram grid consisted of nine posts, only two of which had my face in them. My website before this one was as unassuming as possible, featuring my headshot only in the most necessary places. Even now, I’m crawling my way to a filled-out grid.
Which — if you’ve read like, anything on my website — doesn’t track. I encourage people to take up space, to celebrate their story, and above all things, to get comfortable Sharing Their Experiences. Why, then, am I so hesitant to share mine? Why was it so hard for me to write my website copy without fearing what other people would think? Why was my heart racing through the start of my photo session until my (absolutely wonderful) photographer, Stephanie Hawkins, made me laugh and reminded me to breathe?
For one, I feel a ton of discomfort around *selling my services* when really I wish I could offer that support for nothing — or at least not money. I wish I didn’t have to pay my bills and could just exchange my skills for someone else’s skills, but that’s another post. In the meantime, my reality and my hope are at odds.
The second reason speaks to the same fears I see my clients working through. It. Is. Scary to show your face and use your voice. And even scarier when you can’t do it through the actions of a fictional character. It’s important to me that people who come to this site with a story know mine. It’s even more important that I’m not out here telling other people to do something I wouldn’t do myself.
So why the website revamp? Okay, yes, to attract amazing clients. But, on a deeper level, maybe to give myself permission to own my skills, share my values, and support folks whose needs align with what I’ve got on offer — people I don’t know yet, but want deeply to meet.
What comes of it, who’s to say, but I hope this site and my services make people feel good about their work and about themselves. Above all things, I hope my commitment to working through the discomfort of sharing encourages others to do the same.